Trust is the glue that will predict the quality and longevity of a relationship. When trust is broken in the relationship it can be hard to repair and may potentially lead to separation or divorce. There are different forms of betrayal that can damage a relationship. The extent of the damage will determine whether the relationship can be salvaged. In fact, it may be the case that the betrayer doesn’t recognise the significance of their acts of betrayal and its effect on their partner. It’s important to understand the different types of betrayal that erodes trust in a relationship. These are my top four:
FINANCIAL BETRAYAL
Financial betrayal occurs when one partner makes financial decisions that impact their relationship without their partners consultation. Consistent over-spending on the household budget behind one’s partner’s back, purchasing large ticket items without their partners knowledge or hiding a gambling problem can all wreak havoc on a relationship. The financial security of the relationship becomes jeopardised when one party is left in the dark.
PHYSICAL BETRAYAL
Cheating that includes physical intimacy is the most obvious form of betrayal. Infidelity is a deal breaker for some, but many couples manage to overcome this if the relationship is worth fighting for. The data says that most couples that divorce due to infidelity experience regret and believe they may have got through it if they worked on the cause rather than the effect.
EMOTIONAL BETRAYAL
Emotional cheating includes communicating emotions to others outside the relationship that could betray trust within the relationship. Often emotional betrayal can be as painful or even more painful the physical cheating. If one cannot confide in the ones partner and find emotional support in the relationship, there may be a tendency to source that support outside the relationship which could prove detrimental. Emotional betrayal can cause jealousy and insecurity by creating a third wheel in the relationship.
OBJECT BETRAYAL
Object betrayal is a type of betrayal that people are less likely to be familiar with. Examples of object betrayal in the relationship include going out with your friends every week and never going out with your partner. Working long hours and partaking in to many activities outside the relationship whilst not putting the same effort into spending time with your partner can lead ones to not feel unimportant. When a couple don’t spend time together and other activities take priority the relationship loses trust.
A couple’s commitment and individual values will determine whether betrayal in the relationship can be overcome. Once there is an understanding of the cause of the betrayal and a means to make changes, there is a good chance a couple can get past the hurt and find ways to re-build trust. With the right strategies and support betrayal in the relationship can be repaired.
If you would like to make an appointment to help with any form of betrayal in your relationship, you can contact me here.